We're All Mad Here

“Your foot is hurt because you’re sleepwalking and kicking your lawn gnome,” I told my client, “and what’s better, I’m going to have a baby! Isn’t that awesome?”

When I got home, William and Mum were engaged in some kind of bonding activity.

Mum convinced him to participate in a scientific experiment.

I was suddenly afraid to talk to William. What would he think when he found out we were having a baby so soon? What if he didn’t want it.

Maybe I would write him a note.

I missed seeing Mum’s experiment go very badly.

Maybe hitting someone in the face with a duck is not a good way to make friends.

William took it *very* badly.

Then Mum got a text from someone she barely knew, inviting her to a party.

“Sorry to run out on you, but I absolutely have to be at this party!” Mum exclaimed and dashed out. That was probably smart.

Nobody actually showed up at that party, even the woman who threw it.

So Mum decided to hang out in the empty house for a while. It would give William a chance to cool off.

William came upstairs to tell me what an idiot my Mum was. “Sure,” I said. “What were you expecting?

“But you’re here for me,” I reminded him.

William growled at me, the good kind of growl. “You’re right, I’m here for you. And you want to know something crazy? I want to marry you.”

Wow! That was a turnabout! William fit in with my family just fine!

“Yes!” I said. “I even have a ring right here to make it official!”

“Really?” William said. “You’re prepared for everything.”

“I have to be,” I said. “Besides, I knew you’d come around eventually. You just did it faster than I expected!”

“You have great taste,” William purred.

“I’m glad you appreciate it,” I said.

Erm, I guess this was the best possible time to break the news.

“So this is probably an extra-specially good time to get married. Fast,” I said. “Because the thing is I’m having your baby.”

“You’re what? Wow!”

“Hey, that’s great! I only have one kid. He’s older than you are, and we’re not speaking to each other. He’s such a pansy anyway. This is a great chance to get a new one and try again.”

I can tell William’s going to be an inspired father. Inspired to what, I’m not quite sure.

Meanwhile…

Mum got bored hanging out at the pool in an empty house. So she decided to dance. And then passed out.

Good going, Mum.

———-

And the perfect streak of Generation 2 is ruined by…. Allison.

Passing out 17 + 1 = 18

And hey, he wished for it! William wished to marry Erin! If there were some way to make an idiot propose, I’d’ve done it, but I wasn’t going to waste his free action on that ;).

I thought it would be entertaining for Erin to throw William a bachelor party. So she did and then left. Not the most entertaining party. Half the group spent the party standing around in William and Erin’s bedroom.